Thursday, October 17, 2002

bored bored bored bored. one more hour to go. bored bored bored bored. what can I talk about??? hmmmmmmmmm. ohI know I meant to say last week after the Relient K concert, that matt theissen plays lead, sings lead, and doesn't use a pick. genius I tell ya.

I've been feelings lot's of conviction lately. which is good I guess. it's neccesary anyway. Part of that whole God is the Father and disciplines us stuff. It's just so crazy how you can let sin creep into your life, make the tiniest compromise, then you end up with this like full blown diease. yeah so I"ve stopped listening to secular music again. Long story..but I think it falls into that catagory of "not permissible for ME". Like I have heaps of strong christian friends that listen to "secular" music and it doesn't phase them, and for some reason I thought I was at that point, but yeah like it always just ends up being a foothold for satan to put crap into my head and life. It's hard tho, cause there's alot of good music out there. like i'm still in love with Jack Johnson. So much talent. we'll just have to get him converted! yeah it's also hard cause like the line between "secular" and "sacred" continues to blur with bands like pod, lifehouse, jimmy eat world, and even creed. I mean crikey, even michelle branch has some lyrics that can nearly be worship songs. I guess for me the criteria has become, "was this music created to glorify God"? I'm not trying to say anyone is a bad christian if they dont listen to ALL christian music, I'm just saying for me, that's what I have to and want to do. And you know, maybe it's something you should think about as well. cause as much as our generation has used the "i just like the beat" excuse, music has done us alot of damage. and a lot of good.
another thing I've been really convicted about is all the songs i've been illegally downloading. I know Im probably gonna get alot of crap for mentioning this one. but yeah I mean i'm so good at justifying things. Like so good. I could make a career out of it I bet. (is that what lawyers do?) yeah I mean hello, it IS stealing music. I've just really let my guard down on that one. I mean it's so easy to do when you seriously have NO money and you LOVE music. but yeah I mean what's more important you know, listening to music or fearing God? i guess that's what it's come down to for me. Like I want to follow and obey God and yeah that's not always gong to be fun or easy, but it's ALWAYS going to be to my benefit. I dunno I've just been thnking alot about the fear of the Lord lately. I reckon that was one of the most powerful lecture weeks on DTS for me. Like alot of that stuff still sticks with me and comes back to me in times like this when I'm in a season of just being on my face. Fear of the Lord had always been a really hard concept for me to grasp before that for some reason, but this amazing laday Shirly Brownhill, put it in the most simple,yet profound way. She said fear of the Lord is walking as far away from that "line" rather than seeing how close we can get to it without crossing it. You know that, "how far is too far" line? She said that's totally the wrong question when it comes to fearing and obeying God. We should be running as far away from that as possible, because THEN we are running TOWARDS God.
ha. man that still blows me away. i should read over those notes again. i bet i'd get a whole new revelation. ha. anway...i think i'm done bearing my soul for now. I might go write a few emails. only 40 minutes to go...