Wednesday, November 20, 2002

wow I don't even know where to begin. God is awesome. And will I ever realize that He IS faithful? It might need to fall into His hands a couple more times to get there. ha. or maybe I never will. I'm so.....slow. I dunno. Yesterday just seemed like a mad day of breakthrough in so many areas. I had a mad quiet time, and just... I dunno, felt like I was reconnecting with God. Not to say that I was "disconnected". I dunno the sermon at Phoeinx First AOG on sunday just really challenged me. That plus the worship. It was all about trust. "Just trust me Mel, I have good plans and I'm NOT gonna hurt you" That in combination with some of the stuff that I"m reading in the Sacred Romance right now is just like a double hard kick in the seat. I dunno I just felt so much peace yesterday...and then it got BETTER. God is GOOD! man. How many times have I doubted and He's come through. I hope there's not a limit. I got a call at work from the guy at the Australian consulate that sent me that letter and med. exams last week. Which was not really a miracle in itself cause I think i left him close to 100 messages. But my question was regarding funds, cause the letter said I need to send in proof of adequate finances and so I asked him about it and he was like oh this is your bank statement here...yeeeeeeeeeeah. and he looked at it and was like hmmmm. and my heart SUNK. but then he was like, yes this looks very good,just send in your medical exams. ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? *closes jaw with hand* seriously I didn'tknow how to respond. I don't know what this guys idea of a years worth of money is, but what I had on that statement sure isn't mine! So yeah I guess i'm going!!!!!!!!!!!! Like it's still not official, but I might buy a plane ticket. I mean if my meds are the only thing yet to be approved...yeah i'm defintitely there. oh man. i'm so stoked.
I know I can trust God. I know it in my head though. How long is it going to take me to translate that into "heart language". That I can just let go of my life and jump on the "Jesus train" for the ride. but wow, I'm still in awe. I still know it was all God, and will continue to be all God. If I get a decent priced ticket, that's definitely God. Actually if I get a ticket at all that's God. God is good. you can trust Him.