Monday, September 29, 2003

I just walked in the door from college and all of a sudden had this really powerful thought that broken people are attracted to my life. And, as you do, went straight to the computer to process it.
I just got a lift home with this girl from college who I kinda know but haven't every really hung out with her much and like we were just chatting and stuff and seriously like out of no where she just starts telling me all this stuff she's going through and how hard things have been recently. And I"m just sitting there like, why is it that 1) People with really hard stuff are always comming across my path and 2) Why is it that within 10 minutes of talking to me they just pour their hearts out. Like I know how to help people! I want to! My gosh like the deepest desire of my heart is to see the mass ammounts of brokeness in this city healed, but i so don't know how to do that. Maybe that's why they do open up cause there is some sense that I will just listen to them without trying to fix them. But seriously that is like how kate and I started bonding, we went for a drive one day and "blah" out of no where came her life story and I'm just like why can't I ever be the person with problems. I do have them ya know. I guess this has been something I've kinda been craving all year. I have no sense of being mentored or lead in any relational kind of way by a woman more mature inthe faith than I. I mean I think it's a huge responsibility and a huge privelege to be a part of seeing friends and peers and stuff mature and healed and see chains and bondages broken off their lives and I love that God has allowed me to be a part of that in multiple relationships but yeah I really wish I had someone I could kinda look up to. Someone who would ask me how I'm going and just be able to listen to my rantings. I guess I do have one, or two, or maybe two and a half if I think about it, but I definitely see them far to little and one I haven't seen since I left AZ so there ya go.
Speaking of two and a half, I found out that next monday is a public holiday here and I'm working my normal monday night shift but because it's a holiday I get paid not double time but 2.5 time...or whateve ryou would call that! So hello I'm gonna make like $150 in a 5 hour shift. How good is that!
Aight I'm done.