Sunday, September 07, 2003

There's so much I want to vent here, but so much that is not for public consumption...if you know what I mean. It will be in a couple weeks so stay tuned but for now you get some other stuff. It's just as good so don't think of clicking the little x up there.
I've officially become more aussie. Why you ask? Because I have fallen in love with a little condiment called "Sweet Chili Sauce". Most commonly known for being combined with sour cream and turned into a dip for potato wedges, but you can put it on basically everything. Which I have been doing of late. I used to abhor the stuff and mock (mocha) aussies for eatting it and now...I have turned to the dark side. Just more confirmation that I'm meant to live here forevah I reckon.

I found out today that I am a very meloncholic type person. I always thought I was before but that was when I didn't really know what the definition of meloncholy was. I mean I thought I did, and I kinda did, but now it's been clearly defined for me and I definitely tend to have a melon collie personality. It's not a bad thing...it's kinda cool actually...when used in correct proportions and with correct aims and motives.

I would like to write about my new friend Kate. And I can write about Kate because she doesn't know this blog exsists. Ehhhhhxcellent. Kates a really cool girl that is at college with me, and I've known her pretty much the whole year, but like the last 3 weeks we've just been hanging out heaps and like extracurricularly and it's really cool. It's funny cause in some ways she is who I've always wanted to be. Like this really weird, genius creative person. Like seriously the type where you can look at their clothes and be like, "Oh she's one of those 'creative' types" I've always wanted to be able to have that level of creativity, but I'm too damn logical and I like the GAP too much. It's ok I mean I've come to terms with the gifts God has and hasn't given me, and I do have some level of creative ability and I'm really trying to stretch and grow that, but there's a part of me that still really wants to be able to pull that off. Anyway...back to Kate. The weirdest thing that I'm still comming to terms with is that she's younger than me...like she totally doesn't act it at all and when she tells me about her "past" I definitely feel the younger of the two...or at least the least experienced...but I honestly have like no friends that are younger than me. well like one but I forget she's younger than me as well. The only time I really remember that I'm older is when we're talking about God stuff and like the point in our journey's that we're both on. And I guess age and spiritual maturity don't always go hand in hand, but to some extent they do. So yeah we've been hanging out a lot and I guess that's kind of been freaking me out as well cause it starts to bring up the whole dependency issue. Like it always happens with friendships and especially starting new friendships or spending lots of time with one person before you're really "comfortable" with your relationship. I mean I guess it just brings up past stuff and a somewhat healthy fear of not wanting to relive that, but then like I find myself wanting to back out of stuff like not getting too close or whatever because I dont want to go there. I dunno. It's cool though. We've talked about living together next year with a couple other girls and I think that would rock. If we have the combo of roomies we've been talking about we would seriously have an awesome house. Anyway...I think I'm done talking about that for now. Though there will probably be more in the future cause I really like the idea of being able to process this whole thing in here.

Favorite Psalm of the moment: 5:3
In the morning Oh Lord, you hear my voice
In the morning I lay my requests before you
And wait in expectation

Favorite non-worship song of the moment: 11th Hour by Jars of Clay
"Rescue me from hanging on this line
I won't give up on giving you a chance to blow my mind
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by
I'll find you when I'm running out of time"

Favorite worship songs at the moment (sorry I'm in my Hillsong bubble....it'll burst soon enough):
"My hope is in the name of the Lord
Where my help comes from
Your my strength my song
My trust is in the name of the Lord
I will sing your praise
You are faithful"

and

"When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you above the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you are God"

Sensing any theme's there?
Anyway I reckon this is long enough...if you think about it pray for me. Well basically the only people that read this pray for me anyways so thanks heaps guys. Like I honestly sense the difference in my life. God is blesssing me so much that I can't even believe it sometimes. I love you all SOOOOOOOO much. Latah.