Tuesday, January 20, 2004

The other day I was praying for a friend who has hit some rough terrain in her relationship with God. As I was praying I found myself asking these questions:

Why is it that people who have stable human relationship find themselves struggling with a “roller coaster” relationship with God?

Do we relate to God the same way we relate to human friends? Is there a connection?

If a person generally has dramatic, up-and-down human relationships, does the same apply to their relationship with God?

Does the level of relational skills a person has developed determine the intimacy of their relationship with God?

The final question really summarizes the first three questions, since they are basically all asking the same question just in different ways.
I briefly wrote these questions down in my journal with intentions of revisiting them at a time when I was NOT laying vainly in the sun. (Goes to prove a girl CAN hear from God whilst sun batheing.) Today I sat down in front of my computer wanting to build upon these thoughts and questions but immediately found myself lacking information and in the midst of a research project. (And it's not even for a grade! Inquiring minds just want to know!) So here's my first attempt at getting some information from real life people instead of the opinions and thoughts I form in my head. Have I ever mentioned how much I love my readers? The faithful and the occasional.
If you have time would you please copy and paste the following questions into an email, add your personal experience, thoughts, opinions, etc and send it back my way to knappycurls@hotmail.com. Just think of it as one of those lame "get to know me" surveys, but with some actual substance and purpose. Be as detailed or as general as you feel comfortable with. If you wouldn’t consider yourself “religious” or claim to having any kind of relationship to God please feel free to still answer the questions. You can let me know who you are or remain anonymous (if I know your email address, that might be tricky) but this information is definitely for my eyes only and won't be shown to anyone else without first getting your consent. With out further adu...

In regards to human relationships:

1. Do you consider yourself to be a good friend?

2. Have you been told by others that you’re a good friend?

3. Have you ever had an unresolved falling out with someone you considered to be a good friend?

4. Do you have a “best friend”? If so, how long have you known this person?

5. How many friends do you have that you would consider to be close friends?

6. When you disagree with friends do you generally:

a. Agree to disagree?
b. Allow the situation to escalate into an argument? If so do you generally:
1. Resolve the argument quickly? Drag the situation out?
2. Always feel you’re at fault? Always feel the other person is at fault?

7. Have you ever intentionally created conflict in a relationship for any reason?

8. On average, how much time do you spend communicating with close friends on a weekly basis?

9. Would you consider your close friendships to be stable? If yes, would you say they are continually growing and changing or that they stay the same? If no, why not?

10. Do you find it hard to maintain long distance relationships?

11. Do you consider yourself to be vulnerable with your closest friends?

12. Do you consider your closest friends to be vulnerable with you?

13. If you’re familiar with “love languages” what would you consider your primary love language?

14. Do you find it easiest to communicate with friends while sitting and chatting, doing something, in written form, or verbal but not face to face?

15. Would you consider one or both of your parents to be your friends on any level?

16. Do one or both of your parents have close friends that you’re aware of?

In regards to your relationship with God:

1. Do you have a relationship with God?
2. If yes to the above, would you consider it to be a good relationship?

3. Would you consider God to be a friend?

4. Do you talk to God? If yes how often?

5. Have you ever argued with God? If yes:

a. Were you able to resolve the conflict? How?
b. Did it positively or negatively effect your relationship in the long term?

6. Do you ever get mad at God for no reason or blame him for things that go wrong?

7. How long have you had a relationship with God?

8. Would you consider your relationship with God to be stable? If yes is it changing and growing or has it remained the same?

9. On average, how much time do you spend with God (this can take whatever form you consider to be “spending with God”) on a weekly basis?

10. What do you find the most fruitful way to communicate or spend time with God? (Ex: In a specific place daily, in nature, through music, etc.)

11. Would you say that God communicates to you?

12. Do you feel fulfilled in your relationship with God?